13 for 2013

Traditionally New Years Eve is a time to look forward and set goals for the coming year, but in my world it is also a time to look back on what I am grateful for and what I was able to accomplish. I wanted to share with you and encourage you to take time to reflect on what you learned and accomplished last year. Here are 13 of the most positive things about my 2013

1. I took a chance and put myself out there by starting No Quit In Her.

2. Despite health challenges I was able to run in 12 different 5 & 10Ks, one for each month of 2013.

3. I tested my mental and physical limits and completed my first Tough Mudder

4. I learned about the " I Run 4" program and was matched with my Buddy Ellarie. She is a constant source of inspiration and reminds me to stay humble and be grateful for my blessings.

5. I made the choice to go back to college starting next semester and chase my dream of becoming a Doctor of Physical Therapy.

6. I celebrated 8 years of marriage to my amazing husband. He has stood by me through the best times and the worst. I don't know where I'd be without his love and support.

7. I learned to ride motorcycle and rode solo for the first time in my life. It is something I have always wanted to do and I can't describe how amazing it felt!

8. I took my health into my own hands and am ending the year free of any prescription seizure medications.

9. I met some wonderful new people I can now call friends.

10. I learned to let go. To let go of hold hurts, of what I can't change, and of what I can't control. I learned to move forward, unburdened.

11. Despite the challenges that faced my family I was able to grow in my faith and trust that God has a plan for me, though I may not always understand it.

12. I got to see my youngest son celebrate his first birthday, and my oldest celebrate his third. These little boys hold my whole heart and I am so grateful to be their Mother.

13. I was given the gift of another year to live, learn, and simply be, and for this I am deeply grateful.

Something good in every day

 

Isn't it sad when the best laid plans get shaken up? I should be two weeks into my Paleo challenge but instead my diet is hanging on by a thread, my workouts have been marginal at best and I'm struggling to keep my home running smoothly. This is the honest truth, because I've promised to be real with you. I'd love to post a picture of myself looking fabulous and report that my workouts have been spot on and I'm making progress in leaps and bounds, but right now, I'm not. 

October has been fraught with challenges. Family business has kept me on the road and I have failed to plan. I had a great start to my Paleo challenge but the second things got rough I turned back to my old eating habits and let the workouts slide. I just didn't feel like I had the emotional or physical energy to put into my own well being. I feel bloated, squishy and mentally drained. 

The silver lining to this month has been I have learned to take a step back and really think about my priorities. Times are going to come where I need to take the focus off my own goals and put it into something else and I am learning to be OK with that. I am beginning to find balance and to take pleasure in my journey and not rush to the destination. True, I may not have made as much progress as I would like this month, but little by little I am inching closer to my goals. I am a tiny bit better today than I was yesterday, and my efforts, no matter how small should not be discounted.

Learning to love yourself is hard. It shouldn't be, but that is the truth. It is something I struggle with on a daily basis. Keeping negative self image in check is a constant battle and one I lose more times than I win. But I am going to keep fighting. I'm recommitting to my goals and most importantly focusing on having a positive outlook no matter how hard it is. Every day might not be good, but there is something good in every day.

I look forward to having some solid progress to report at the beginning of next month and just want to thank you again for your support and for taking the time to share this journey with me. I have some big things in the works that I can't wait to share with you, no matter how long it takes me to make them happen!  

Can't quit, won't quit, NO QUIT! 

 

Paleo or PaleNO?

September has been a huge month!

After finishing my very first Tough Mudder I arrived home hungry for more. I want to do it again and I want to be better, faster, and stronger. Despite my best efforts training and dieting correctly I've been unable to get the scale to budge. This combined with some other health issues I've been having led my doctor to do some blood work to check on how my thyroid is doing. I'm still waiting on the results but in the mean time I'm going to do everything I can to ensure I'm nourishing my body properly. 

I've started back on a multivitamin and extra iron (per doctors orders for anemia) and I always find myself wondering what I can do to take better care of my body while still staying focused on my goals of losing body fat and increasing muscle mass.

It was through following Crossfit that I first heard about the Paleo diet. I brushed it off saying (I quote) "The idea of cutting out any food group entirely is just stupid. Why would anyone ever do that?" As time has gone on I've heard more and more about it, noticed some tasty looking recipes, and learned that a handful of elite athletes I admire embrace the Paleo lifestyle, so I decided to dig in and learn a bit more.

Andrea Ager- Elite Crossfit Athlete and Paleo Princess

According to Thepaleodiet.com this is paleo in a nutshell:

"The Paleo Diet is based upon eating wholesome, contemporary foods from the food groups our hunter-gatherer ancestors would have thrived on during the Paleolithic era, the time period from about 2.6 million years ago to the beginning of the agricultural revolution, about 10,000 years ago. These foods include fresh meats (preferably grass-produced or free-ranging beef, pork, lamb, poultry, and game meat, if you can get it), fish, seafood, fresh fruits, vegetables, seeds, nuts, and healthful oils (olive, coconut, avocado, macadamia, walnut and flaxseed). Dairy products, cereal grains, legumes, refined sugars and processed foods were not part of our ancestral menu."

This gave me a pretty good picture of what I could eat, and also a pretty good idea of what I couldn't but just to be sure, I searched a little further. Sure enough, this is what I found. In huge red letters the words "DON'T EAT" followed by this list

-cereal grains

- legumes (including peanuts)

- dairy

- refined sugar,

- potatoes

- processed foods

- salt 

- refined vegetable oils

As the daughter of an Iowa diary farmer my hackles immediately rose. What do they mean no dairy!? I grew up milking cattle and drinking whole milk fresh from the bulk tank morning noon and night. Not only that but I love yogurt, cheese, and milk. Raising two sons, they are food staples in our house. Admittedly I haven't been consuming as much dairy lately, but I certainly haven't cut it out of my diet entirely. 

Also included in the great loves of my life are salty snacks. You can take my sweets, I might complain a little but take my salt? You've got to be kidding me. I've always clung to an old school bodybuilding mentality of clean eating. Avoiding sugar, and pre-packaged processed food is a given. However healthy grains such as oats, quinoa and brown rice are a staple of clean eating. Is it really possible to excel as an athlete while cutting out grains and legumes? 

That being said the health benefits boasted by Paleo speak for themselves. Converts who follow the prescribed diet are nearly entirely free of many of the diseases plaguing western civilization including obesity, cardiovascular disease, cancer, osteoporosis, and acne just to name a few. There is also a nice list of what you should eat when following Paleo. Included are a few favorites of mine, namely meat and eggs as well as nuts and seeds. 

It was enough to give me pause and make me reconsider brushing it off so quickly. Honestly, at this point what have I got to lose? (besides body fat) That being said, I am excited to announce I will be giving Paleo a trial run for the month of October! I am allowing myself 2 "cheat" meals for the month that may include ingredients from the list of forbidden foods (as I have so fondly named it) I am going to be taking before and after shots (which I may or may no share with you) as well as measurements to help me keep track of my physical progress. I am also going to keep notes on how I feel and any special improvements or drawbacks that I notice in my health and general feelings of wellness. 

I did find the website http://thepaleodiet.com to be a fantastic resource, and seeing as I am not an expert I would highly recommend checking them out if you would like more information. I'd also like to mention http://civilizedcavemancooking.com as a wealth of delicious recipes. Either way I look forward to sharing my little experiment with you! Here is to hoping for some fantastic results!  

So you want to be a Mudder?

Team Space Lord Mudders

I'm writing this from the other side of a 6 month journey. When I signed up for Tough Mudder Wisconsin I did it because I wanted the challenge. I wanted to push myself and test my limits. I wanted to prove to myself and the world that I was Tough. In the end it became so much more. What follows is my personal account of what I felt and learned. The beauty of this is that every experience is different. You will laugh, you will cry, you will cringe, overall I hope you will be inspired to do something you've never done before, maybe something you'll never do again, but at least you can say you tried.

I woke up the morning of my event with a lot on my mind. Every ounce of sanity in my body (which some would argue isn't much) was screaming I never should have been here. I had been a ball of nerves for days. "What if I blow out a knee?" "What if I start to seize and can't finish"  With my plethora of health concerns I wasn't an ideal candidate to take on this course, but there was no going back now.

I ate my oatmeal in silence, watching the other Mudders staying at our hotel as they passed through the breakfast room. Some looked jovial, others looked like they wanted to puke in their shoes. I decided I was somewhere in the middle and that was a good place to be.

I went back to my room and started getting ready. Full length cold gear tights? Check. Nike Pro team shirt? Check. and so on, but there was something else on my mind. I had decided long before that day that I was going to do this in honor of TOF. This is a nickname given to my Uncle by his wife. It is very to the point as it stands for "Tough Old !@#$&!" (you can figure it out) TOF, having already beaten Leukemia, is now battling lung cancer. I've wished for so long there was something I could do, something I could give, to show how much I care. 9-7-13 marked the day I attempted my greatest athletic achievement to date, it was going to take all I had in me, and that was all I had to give. I dedicated my first TM, whatever the outcome, to TOF. He is not a man who enjoys attention or being fussed over, in fact he may cringe, if he happens to read this. But my hope is there will also be a little tug of a smile.

As I finished getting dressed a clap of thunder sounded and the skies opened up. It began to rain. And when I say rain I mean pour. Huge heavy drops were smattering the window and I started laughing. Suddenly I wasn't nervous anymore. It was go time. I was ready. 

There was a quick break in the rain and I was able to grab this shot before we started. Representing for Fierce Forward and TOF! This is also the only photo I have my race number as it was lost on the first obstacle.

Fast Forward to the starting corral. I call it a corral because as a farm kid this is the best way I can describe it. Here is the scene. It's still pouring, our shoes are soaked just walking under the starting arch. We follow the horde to a wall, probably 8 feet give or take, which we are responsible for getting over. Once we get over we are greeted by Marines screaming over the rain for us to keep moving forward, as we had to squeeze 100 more people into the area. There was literally steam rising up off all the warm bodies because the rain was that cold.

Once an appropriate amount of Mudders had made it in we are addressed by the Man himself, Sean Corvelle. Sean is an actor, comedian, and most recently Emcee for Tough Mudder. It's his job to get us pumped, and he did. Tough Mudder is a huge supporter of the military (the course was designed by special forces) and more specifically the Wounded Warrior Project. I am proud to say that Team Space Lord Mudders with the help of family and friends raised nearly $300 for WWP, more if you count the pull ups that Thack knocked out in the burn zone. After thanking our service men and women and playing the national anthem, the shot rang out and we were off. 

At this point I want to break away from my usual writing style and get down to the meat and potatoes of this. I know many of you are reading this in hopes of gathering intel for your own TM experience. Hopefully I address some of your concerns.

1. GEAR- even if it is going to be hot when your event is taking place I recommend long tights (Ladies we don't have all that leg hair to protect us like the dudes do...err...at least I HOPE we don't) and if it is going to be chilly a long sleeved top as well. You will STILL come out with plenty of bruises and scratches so don't be a hero. It will hopefully spare you some of the nastier things like embedded gravel, hay slivers, and chafing. Avoid cotton at all costs. Remember you aren't just getting dirty. This course takes you underwater and cotton will soak all that filthy water up and leave you carrying it. Also, don't forget to apply a strong waterproof sunblock and eat a good breakfast. There are water stations and bananas provided along the course but they aren't going to be enough if you skipped a morning meal. 

2. I know a lot of you, like me, are not excited to be electrocuted. There are 2 electricity obstacles. Electric Eel, and just before you finish, Electroshock Therapy. You can read about the specifics of the obstacles on the Tough Mudder website. What I was not able to find was a clear description of what it would feel like to be shocked, though I'm sure it differs from person to person, and definitely depends on how much of a hit you take. This will either ease your mind or terrify you and I found that ignorance was very near bliss so read at your own risk. 

Still reading? Ok, here you go.

I got hammered by both electricity obstacles and it hurt, badly. The little shocks are kind of like being slapped, the big ones, which I took a few of, are like being punched, hard. You feel the hit, then the burn, and by then you're most likely getting hit again, unless you are getting out of the obstacle. My biggest hits  literally took my breath. I saw one guy get laid out from a shock. This being said you can get through the obstacles relatively quickly. Watch the people ahead of you, don't get stuck behind someone who is going to freeze because if they do you're just standing there getting electrocuted. When it comes to electric eel, stay low, low, low. Don't stick that butt up when you're crawling, that is just asking for it. 

3. If I had to choose 3 things I would have done better in preparation it would have been, more upper body work, more work on stabilizer muscles, and more work on balance. Climbing/pulling yourself over those walls is difficult, even with other mudders or your teammates lending a helping hand. You are literally running through slippery mud. Cue blown out knee, twisted ankle, etc. If you have time work on those areas, I promise you won't be sorry. 

4. The hold your wood obstacle is no joke. You carry that log for a solid quarter mile, maybe longer, and it's in the super slippery mud. Don't expect to find a small log. Most of them are bigger than you are. I manned up an carried my own. I wanted to be a beast, but I also didn't want to drag my team down with me if I slipped. Make sure you are prepped for this. It sucks, but it makes you feel totally B.A when throw that thing down in triumph. 

5. Arctic Enema. Oh, Arctic Enema. What can I say? I started sitting on the edge of the dumpster, put my feet in for a second, then dropped down in. Honestly sitting on the edge and even getting in I thought I could handle it with relative ease and little pain....then I had to swim under the wall. That is when it gets painful. You come up out of there and it's a total body brain freeze. Be sure to keep moving, if you can muster the strength, keep running after this. It's important to stay warm or you'll start to cramp up. I've heard of Mudders taking cold showers beforehand to prep. In my opinion that is just prolonging the agony for no reason. You can't prep for this. Take a hint from Nike, Just do it. 

6. Walk the plank looks a lot higher from the end of the plank that it does from the ground. The water will be cold when you hit it because it's deep. Do NOT open your eyes or mouth. I loved this obstacle but then again, I am not afraid of heights. 

7. Everest is a lot harder than it looks. This is where that balance and upper body strength will come in handy. Run as hard as you can, jump and if you reach the rope don't let go. This is all about team work and no Mudder left behind.

You want more? Check out these 2 videos put together by my teammate Adam. He did an awesome job and you really get a feel for the event. You'll be rooting for us by the end! 

http://youtu.be/QbDYkZyFV-M   and part II  http://youtu.be/c3Paur8S0E8

Unless my memory is still failing me (it's entirely possible) I think that covers most of the big ticket obstacles . I should note there is a new obstacle, Cage Crawl, that was just debuted at TMWI. If you are claustrophobic this could be a problem. You slide into a water filled trench and there is a chain link fence above you with only an inch or two of clearance between it and the water. I loved it, I glided under on my back, using the fence to propel myself forward.

Crossing the finish line was bittersweet for me. Let's face it you have to be a bit crazy to want this, you have to, in a way, enjoy the pain. I had trained for so long. I loved every step, even the painful ones, and now it was over. But in the end isn't that what fitness, and life, is all about? Pushing yourself to become better. If it doesn't challenge you, it won't change you. As Hemingway said, "Be wholly alive with all your might". For me, this was therapeutic, I came out feeling like a million dollars. I left all my shreds of self doubt back in the mud, which was what it was all about in the first place. 

As I made my way out of the finisher chute, a muddy orange headband on my head and a cold beer in my hand, I was left with two thoughts.

I did it. 

Life is good. 

Race week

As I'm sitting here I have 3 days until Tough Mudder Wisconsin *deep breath* 

I can't tell you how excited I am, or how nervous. I've trained, I've mentally prepped, and I have 2 BA soldiers going into this with me, but the nerves are still there. On the bright side I am also VERY excited! Everything has fallen into place nicely. I've got my duds ready and I'm winding down the workouts.

This week has been rest so far, today I plan to tear my legs up and tomorrow hit total upper body. After that Thursday and Friday will be travel and rest days, with a nice meal Friday night, then RACE DAY! 

I decided on full length all weather tights and a Nike Pro Combat compression top with sleeves. So far the forecast is showing a high of 83 and a low of 60, partly cloudy all day, but there will be a breeze. My thought was with the Arctic Enema being the first obstacle (jumping into a giant dumpster filled with ice water, pictured below) if I run into backup at any other obstacles the cold might start causing my muscles to cramp up, so I opted for warmer, quick drying clothing. 

Arctic Enema

The other obstacle weighing heavy on my mind is Electroshock Therapy. TM offers the following description

 "Sprint through a field of live wires — some carrying as much as 10,000 volts of electric shock. Watch out for hay bales and deep mud, or you will face-plant into some electrifying mud. Some Mudders℠ try to stealthily wind their way through the wires without getting shocked, while others barrel forward to get through as quickly as possible. Either way, you are guaranteed to get zapped with as much as 10,000 volts of electricity and it does NOT tickle. This is always the last obstacle Mudders must overcome before they cross the finish line."

One lucky lady in the throes of "Electroshock Therapy"

I feel like there is really no way to prepare for this. I mean honestly who wakes up and says "I better train for electroshock today" and goes to find some live wires to run through. My plan is to cover my face (after hearing stories of eyebrows being singed off, etc) and barrel through as quickly as I can after 12 miles.....yeah....wish me luck on that! The girl in the photo looks like she is having tons of fun right!?

All in all I know I'm ready, I've trained and I've been waiting, but I'm still shaking in my Asics. 

I can't wait until I can tell you all about the experience and how I rocked it. 

Can't quit, won't quit, NO QUIT! 

The Warrior Workouts

IT'S AUGUST!

It occurred to me last week that July was almost over, leaving me precious little time to finish preparing for Tough Mudder. In a panic, I realized I had lost focus of my strength goals by pouring all my energy into cardio training. That's when I emailed Ashley. 

In case you haven't noticed I'm a huge fan of Ashley John's and what she does with her brand, Fierce Forward. I've always admired her physique as well as her positive, yet no BS attitude. Among her many accomplishments is making herself a Tough Mudder earlier this year; I knew if anyone could help me it would be her. I shot off a desperate email explaining my predicament and asking if she could put something together for me on such short notice. All I can say is, I asked for it.

I received my plan and the first thing I noticed were that the workouts were named as follows...

"Leg TORTURE with a hint of shoulders"

"The back chamber + abs"

"Shoulder Assault" (I had mentioned that having ripped shoulders was a personal goal of mine, I feel so special) 

"Tricep, Bicep, and Chest Killer"  and my personal favorite...

"The you're gonna wish you didn't workout day" 

The exercises are super-sets and there is cardio worked in, with HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training) as the focus.  

I'm beyond excited to share this journey with you! I debated on whether or not to post my stats but ultimately decided on full disclosure, hoping for accountability and motivation so here I am...in inches. 

8/5/13 - Day 1 

Height - 5' 9"

Weight - 155.3

Biceps-12"

Chest- 36" 

Waist-29.5"

Hips- 38.5"

Thighs- 23.5"

Calves -16"

I'd love to change my body composition and trade up some fat for more muscle, so I'm also making dietary changes. My goal is to keep it clean as always with a focus on lower carbohydrates and higher protein content with lots of leafy greens to help keep me healthy and of course, a gallon of water daily. 

 I'm willing to put in the work, now lets see what I can do. As always HAPPY TRAINING TO YOU! 

Going for the Gold

July has been a whirlwind! I can scarcely believe as I'm sitting here it is already the 22nd, it has been a month full of blessings as well as challenges.

I was able to participate in Moonlight Chase 2013 in Eldridge, IA which was an absolute BLAST! I gave myself permission to just relax and have fun so no PRs there. If you ever get a chance to go I HIGHLY recommend it. The people in town are friendly, and the 4 mile course is flat and fast! The race starts at 9 pm as you run through town people play music for you, there are even a few live bands. Spectators hand out glow sticks and high fives as you run by. There are usually a few sprinklers set up for you to run through on the way and it ends with a huge party on main street. This year I ran with my girl Kelli (more small town running royalty, she is the pretty blonde in the photo) and couldn't have had a better night! The "Girls Gone Muddy" were up to no good again!

Me + Kel = Girls Gone Muddy...even at a non-obstacle race! 

Last month my husband noticed that a mole on my back had changed and "didn't look right" so I scheduled an appointment with my dermatologist. She took one look and said it needed to go, it was most likely malignant. A few weeks later it was removed and sent in for a biopsy which confirmed their suspicions. The good news is she felt no further treatment was needed and as long as I didn't notice any other changes I could come back in 6 months. This really wasn't a surprise, being a fair- eyed redhead with 7 of the 10 warning signs for skin cancer, but I hadn't expected it to hit at 27. The good news is as long as I stay on top of my sunblock and my checkups this shouldn't be a problem down the line. We can catch any other problem spots before they become a real issue. I would be remiss if I didn't throw it out there, if you haven't had a check, you should get on that. It doesn't hurt and most insurances will cover it. Get it done!

Training with the stitches in my back has been a challenge. They had to cut deep to get all the tissue removed so I need to keep them in until the beginning of next month, and they seem to be seriously throwing off my game. They pull with every movement and I can't wait to have them taken out and get back to normal.

On July 20th I hit up the Puckerbrush 5k in Forest City, IA and had the privilege of running with my 2 brothers. The race course was fun and well organized, as well as awards for the overall male and female winners they awarded medals for 1st and 2nd place in each age group. They also gave out a TON of awesome door prizes courtesy of the race sponsors.

My little brother Dan took home the overall win with a time of 18:18, and my older brother Johnny landed a respectable 4th in his age group, I am ridiculously proud of them. I knew going into it I was off, my stitches were pulling and I was sore but I gave it my all. Disappointingly, I ended up missing a medal by 1:00. Even so, I had a awesome day. I feel so blessed to have such a wonderful family and it was special to get to run with the guys.

My Brothers and I! Dan on the left, Johnny on the right! 

Dan accepting his Award for overall winner! 

After coming so close to another medal for the summer I'm moving forward with a new purpose. My next 5k will be the Lisbon Kraut Route on August 10th and I am going for the Gold! I'd like to take 1st in my age group as well as PR for a 5K, it would be extra special since the race is right outside my front door. I'll also start hitting the weights again in August, working on my upper body and core strength.

I have less than 50 days until the big one, it's time to get pumped, and get down to business. I couldn't be more excited! Life is good! 

Warrior Dash for the win!

So, it's the Monday after my first Warrior Dash weekend and as I sit here on my sore (yes, I'm still sore) behind I thought I would share my experience and what I learned about obstacle racing with you! Hopefully you can put some of it in your pocket and use it on your own adventure!

The event was very well organized, I found this to be a pleasant surprise as I was expecting at least a minor amount of chaos. Parking was provided at $10 per vehicle and there were friendly staff directing traffic through the lot. I feel like they did a good job keeping things moving. Once we found a parking spot you walked to the bus area where you could load up and get a relatively quick ride over to the race venue. In my case, Afton Alps. The bus ride gave a feeling of heading off to summer camp as we wound down through some wooded areas towards the venue. It was a fun chance to shoot the bull with other would-be Warriors and, of course, take an abundance of photos. I kind of felt like a loser not having my camera out so I got this gem for you.

We stepped off the bus to be greeted by music, dancing, and of course MUD! If you plan to attend this event as a spectator I suggest you drop any illusions of staying clean immediately. From the bus drop off point you could walk directly to the packet pickup station. They were friendly, and efficient. Gear check was provided for free and located right next door to packet pickup. I believe the time between setting foot on the bus and checking my gear was only 30 mins at most. READ, you don't have to waste a ton of time standing in lines. WIN!

Smoke from the fire jump obstacle

When it came time for the running to commence we made our way to the starting line. To avoid obstacles being bogged down they had divided each heat into 2 smaller groups to start 10 mins apart. I really appreciated this as I did not have to stand in line for a single obstacle, MAJOR points for that. The MC had us duke it out for which group got go to go first by having us cheer and "Throw up the horns", my side won, naturally. 

We took off up a monstrous hill and it was all good muddy fun from there. (Ok yeah, there was some work in there too ;)  As it turns out I had overestimated the obstacles and grossly underestimated the running. The hills...ohmygoodness the hills. I knew it was important to train for them but apparently I didn't train hard enough. I was feeling the burn. Obstacles included climbing nets, ropes and walls, shimmying under barbed wire, jumping over fire, all fun and relatively simple. Keep in mind this event was not meant to scare people off, it was created to be fun and inclusive regardless of athletic ability.

After swimming through a final trough of muddy water I was greeted by yet more friendly staff at the finish line where I was rewarded for my efforts with a hearty high five, a medal, and a beer on the house. (In addition to my super sweet swag bag with a t-shirt and fuzzy viking helmet!) I'd say it is easily worth the $65 entry fee. (note: I registered relatively early. As with most events the price climbs the closer you get to the big day) 

A few things I learned about obstacle races (AKA Mud Runs) 

1. TRAIN FOR HILLS!!!! I am fairly certain the race creators use every single one at their disposal. They probably sit somewhere watching from an eye in the sky and laugh as you trudge up the umpteenth one laughing and saying "They PAID to do this!" Show 'em who's boss! 

2. You may want to opt for a taller sock, or at least something ankle length. I found it helped to keep the sand and grit out of my shoes. Wet feet + sand/grit/rocks = torn up feet. No fun! 

3. Bring some plastic sandals to slip on after. I intended to donate my race shoes, so in my infinite wisdom I packed a SECOND pair of trainers "Because then I'll have a dry pair". Well considering the rest of me was still sopping wet and filthy when I put them on my "dry pair" didn't last long. Should have thought that one through a little better! 

4. Be sure to pack some cash for incidentals. Parking, food/drinks, any souvenirs you may want, etc. There was a water station provided, as well as a free beer but food was on your dime and there were some pretty yummy things available. (see giant turkey leg below) 

As of today all that stands between me and Tough Mudder is two months and a handful of 5Ks. I am going to take what I learned this weekend, modify my training and keep on trucking. Thanks for hanging in there with me! I'm happy to answer any questions I can and of course Happy Training! 

Success and the "Appreciation Challenge"

"Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm."- Winston Churchill

Failure is not a fun word. Failure is something to fear, something to be ashamed of, something no one wants to be labeled as or experience. Success is something we strive for. We set goals for ourselves, create a plan to achieve them, and get to work, assuming once we hit our "end point" we will experience and in essence become success. What we tend to forget is, without failure, there can be no success.

In the world today we are constantly bombarded with images of what it means to be "a success". Things we need to posses and molds our appearances should fit into. When we inevitably don't fit these molds our feelings of self-worth begin to erode. Depression builds over things we don't have but didn't know we "needed" until someone told us so. In the end feelings of emptiness creep in, as if we, as people, have no value. Nothing could be further from the truth.

This week I am doing my best to take a moment to step back and truly appreciate what God has blessed me with. I will appreciate the changes in my body, and how much stronger I have become physically and mentally. I will appreciate my family and the love we share. I will appreciate our home, and my ability to serve those who live there. The strength to truly savor the moment, to revel in my journey instead of fretting over how far I have to get to my goal. This is living, this is a gift, and to me this is success.

I challenge you to join me in this pursuit. Take a few minutes for yourself each day to experience gratitude for what you have, and how far you've come. Let it humble you, let the deep sense of peace and joy cleanse your soul of worry. God is good and so is life, if you just take the time to notice.

I would love to hear what success means to you, and what you are grateful for. I'm here, and as always, Happy Training!

No going back

Something changed for me today

I was having a conversation recently where there were some comments made about my weight during a certain period of my life about 5 or 6 years ago. I was called "chunky" and "fat" and then told "But look how far you've come!" as if that should erase the hurt of what was said.

The time period in reference was a rough one for me on so many levels. My husband was away for 6 months attending an officer training course for the Army and I was home alone working a high-stress sales job that kept me tethered to a phone and confined to a desk the majority of every day. What no one knew was even though I had gained weight I was deep in the throes of bulimia.

When people think of disordered eating they think skinny. It's just the way it is. This is also a huge misconception. Disordered eating does not fit into the two tidy boxes of anorexia and bulimia, it is as individual as the person suffering. That person might not even know there is anything wrong until they are in so deep they can't get out on their own. It starts with the negative thoughts "I can't believe I ate that, I'm such a fatty!" and progresses to feeling dirty from the inside out every time we eat, no matter what we eat, until we develop a real and crippling fear of food.

I spent my days at work sitting at my desk surrounded by food. In the office environment every menial accomplishment by a team member was celebrated with a 10 pound pastry. I studiously avoided eating the food provided, packing myself meager lunches of healthy fare that I would eat alone in my car during my break. The stress of the job ate away at me mentally and my body ached from disuse. When I went home to my empty apartment I was horribly lonely, mentally exhausted, and constantly hungry from starving myself all day, and so I ate. I ate until I was in physical pain and then I threw all the pain back up.

Despite the purging my weight hovered near the top end of what was considered "healthy" for my 5' 9" frame. No one would have looked at me and seen what was happening, and I didn't ask for help. This wasn't my first rodeo with an eating disorder and over time I began to take steps towards improving but it wasn't until my pregnancy with my first son that I was truly able to put bulimia behind me.

When those comments were made all of this came flooding back. I sat there holding back the tears and feebly protesting that I wasn't fat, then laughing it off because continuing the conversation would only hurt more. I've spent the last couple of days feeling bruised over what was said. Doubting who I was at the time, thinking "I was fat" started morphing into "I am fat" and the negative though patterns started to come back "Your butt is so big, you don't deserve it eat.", "look at all the fat on your belly, disgusting." and then I made a choice.

I made the choice not to go back. I made the choice to be stronger than someone else's words. I refuse to go back to a place where I beat myself up over every bite of food that passes my lips. I won't let someone else's opinion of who I am, was, or should be shape how I see myself. Every day that passes I put myself closer to achieving my goals. I work hard, I eat well. It is not realistic for me to say I am never going to touch sugar again or that I won't have carbs until the scale says what I want it to. I am giving myself permission to be human. I can't go back and change the past but I can shape my future, one positive choice at a time,

and it looks pretty bright from here.

New art!

May was an exciting month for me both in terms of training as well as developing No quit in her. In addition to increasing my weekly miles run I was able to complete the project of new art for my Facebook page and of course this blog!

I was fortunate enough to be able to hire a friend, Kitty Redden, (who just happens to be a graphic art genius) to help me turn my ramblings into something real. My first thought was to embody the concept of the phoenix. I felt the legend of the bird being cyclically reborn was a perfect analogy for NQ, but I wasn't sold on the typical art associated with a phoenix so we branched out. 

It was very important to me to put a touch of myself and my style into the art and with that in mind we settled on the Valkyrie wings.  In Norse mythology the Valkyrie is one of a host of female figures who decide which soldiers live in battle and which die. It's easy to change the story and apply it to your life. You are a soldier, the battle is your day to day relationship with health and wellness. You can choose to "live" by focusing on making positive choices for yourself. You can earn your own set of  Valkyrie wings! 

We started with my scribbles. With Kitty being based out of Washington state we had to communicate via the internet but we were able to send photos back and forth to help us zero in on the finished project.

After a few sketches and a first draft we settled on a blue/black color scheme and kept it pretty clean and simple. My hope was for it to be eye catching and convey a feeling of strength. However, I didn't want anything overly busy or overwhelming. 

It was so exciting for me to see my vision come together, and take this step towards making my dream a reality. I honestly couldn't be more excited to share this with you. I hope that when you see the art you are reminded of how strong you are. Once you've made the choice to live nothing can hold you back! The power to grow and change is in your hands. 

I'd love to hear your thoughts, as always drop me a line anytime and happy training! 

This is why

As I watched my son running down the path calling back to me "I'm running Mama! I'm running! Let's run Mama!" I smiled and thought to myself  "This is why."

When we think of reasons to stay fit many things come to mind. We check boxes on a list. I want to be sexy, I want to feel great, I want to improve my athletic performance. I for one want all of those things, but I want something deeper. I don't want my sons to see a mother who obsesses over every bite of food that passes her lips, wondering if it will go straight to her thighs. I want them to see a mother who nourishes her body and theirs with wholesome food. I don't want them to see a mother who trudges to the gym moaning the whole way that she'd rather be anyplace but there. I want them to see a smile on my face, knowing I am doing something good for myself that I love.

Last week I had a day where I wasn't going to be able to make my usual evening run so I had to improvise. I decided on a routine in our back yard running sprints with intervals of burpees, pushups, and step ups. I brought the boys out with me, setting my youngest on a blanket in the shade, and big brother running around the yard.

As I started my first sprint I saw him watching me. There was a little sparkle in those big blue eyes. Quick as a whip he was up and running after me. "Mama! Mama! We're running Mama!" Though his little legs couldn't keep up he pushed on. Not a drop of the sweat running down his face could dampen that smile. When I stopped for my first set of pushups he was right there with me. "You doin' workout Mama?" When I replied yes he dropped down next to me and began to mimic my movements with his tiny baby arms. "I workout too Mama! Let's do workout!"

After a few minutes of trying my sweet little man went and flopped down on the blanket next to his baby brother, keeping a watchful eye on me the whole time. As my workout wore on I began to slow. My arms started to shake, my legs were getting fatigued and I finally sat down. Just a quick rest, I told myself. I barely had time to wipe the sweat from my brow before he was at my side. "Get up Mama! You can do it!" My heart skipped a beat as I blinked back a happy tear. How did my two year old boy know just what to say?

Slowly I got to my feet and took a deep breath. As started out for another round I heard him calling "Run Mama RUN!" followed by the sweetest giggles and as I looked back I saw them. My boys, my beautiful sons watching me with the biggest smiles on their faces. Then I knew.

Back on the path, smiling, I call after him. "Here I come!" The wind pushes the hair back from my face and I start to jog after him. This is why.

We have to start somewhere

So here I am!

I'm here to share with you. My struggles and my successes; my joy and my pain. Why, you ask? Because there is a chance I've been where you've been. Maybe I want to be where you are. If I can bring one person joy and encouragement by putting myself out there, that is a chance I am willing to take. I'm also willing to bet you will be there to cheer me on along the way and like the song says, we all need somebody to lean on.

My relationship with fitness has been full of highs and lows, think Brittany and K-Fed, except fitness and I are still together. My teens and early twenties took me through anorexia, bulimia, 6 knee operations, an ectopic pregnancy, and an ongoing battle with catamenial epilepsy. On the flip side I was deeply blessed when I married my handsome soldier and gave birth to two strapping boys, the little lights of my life.

The realization that I needed to get healthy again came after the birth of my first son. My pregnancy with him had been fraught with challenges. We found out I was expecting just two months after my ectopic and spent the first weeks after going back and forth to doctors who told us on numerous occasions that  "this will not be a viable pregnancy". We also got word that my husband would be deploying and the time frame was such that he would miss the birth of our son as well as most of his first year. I was devastated. By the time I gave birth I had packed on over 60 pounds. With my faith and my wonderful family (special shout out to you Mom and my sweet sweet Rach for holding that video camera. Keeping your head craned away from my Hoo-Ha and still managing to get those glamour shots couldn't have been easy. My husband thanks you) I began my life as a mother, but I didn't feel like myself. It was like living in a strangers body. I began to dabble in clean eating, started running and lifting weights again and by the time I became pregnant with my second son in October 2012 I had lost the baby weight as well as an extra 20 pounds! 

I didn't gain as much weight with my second but still managed to put on a solid 40 and after repeating my weight loss cycle I was looking for a new challenge. A few years back I had heard about a growing number of people competing in obstacle races so I started digging and found exactly what I was looking for. A brutal combination of running and strength challenges. I have a background in both distance running and weight lifting but never in combination like this. I immediately signed up for Warrior Dash and Tough Mudder, with the latter as my focus. I was also proud to take on the challenge of fund raising for Wounded Warrior Project as part of my participation in TM. I devoured every bit of information I could about how to train specifically for these events, and started formulating a plan.

With 130 days until "The Big One" AKA Tough Mudder, it is time to buckle down. For me this encompasses my entire lifestyle from eating habits and workouts to making sure I get enough sleep (difficult to do with a 2.5 year old and a 9 month old) Meeting this challenge is going to take everything I've got physically and most importantly mentally. I can't wait to share this journey with you. When I'm finally standing at the finish line I'll be able to say with confidence that there's "No quit in here" and everyone else will know, there's no quit in HER.